The thing you have to understand about JE boybands is that it's not just about the music. And I don't mean that in a "their vaguely synchronized dancing is so much MORE, it touches my SOUL," way, I mean, literally, there's a fucktron more to it -- they're not just singers, they're bred and groomed to be full-time, all-around entertainers, so in addition to albums and videos and etc etc you've also got concerts, stage productions, interviews, DVDs, TV skits and segments and performances, hosting and producing variety shows, music shows, radio shows, let's get mauled by exotic wildlife shows, starring roles in dramas, movies, commercials, appearing in monthly magazines and on really big billboards. These guys sing and dance and act and endorse and do backflips. They do it all in shiny costumes while touching each other.
Now, multiply all that and give it to a large number of bands, with anywhere from two to eight members each.
DO YOU SEE HOW JPOP HAS SUCKED OUT MY SOUL.
And you thought all boybands were squeaky-clean bubblegum pop, right? >:D Welcome to KAT-TUN, and immensely popular and unbelievably shameless group made of six hot hot members whose selling point is kind of like SEX SEX SEX, blinking in neon colors, flashing you a little leg.
Here are your members:
The great thing about KAT-TUN (or just the Japanese entertainment industry, really) is that they know their fangirls. Naked? Gay? Naked gay? "Sure," KAT-TUN says, "it's not like we're burdened with shame or anything." Fanservice is deliberate, shirts and optional. You are encouraged to leave your morals at the door.
Please write me porn.
-- see icon. No, really.
There have been pictures.
Two words: Pikachu costume.
They'd like to make you think the whole sex god thing comes naturally, but -- well. They are, before anything else, girly twenty-something pop idols whose closest encounter with the female species has been when they crossdress.
They are hopeless dorks, y'all.
*Wherein he walks straight into a screen.
*And asks strangers for money.
*And screams like a girl.
*Do you want some car shrimp?
*Let's ANNOY THE ANIMAL WITH SHARP TEETH, I'm sure that won't cause any problems!
*WHAT IS HE TRYING TO BE.
And, for the sake of completeness, here's a fan compilation of The Best of Dumb Jin.
It's twenty minutes long.
( -- beatboxing. I meant beatboxing.)
KAT-TUN has a complex and delicate inner workings system that relies on their ability to appeal and ensnare; to truly understand them, you must appreciate the efforts of their work and contemplate the materials presented at length.
You see, KAT-TUN can be summed as follows --
SEX AND RETARDATION
-- and it takes a zen mind to fully comprehend, nay, welcome it.
(Those are both boys, by the way.)
... ladies and gentlemen, KAT-TUN. :))
Wolfie, I remain unconvinced! Also, that was the lamest picspam ever!
All the cool girls try to rip Jin's clothes off. Why don't you?